I've been putting off starting Insanity for two weeks now. I've been scared to death of it.
With good reason. Holy crap.
I started today with just the FIT TEST. It's a 25 minute DVD and I am OUT OF SHAPE b/c I am SWEATING LIKE A PIG. And hurting. Geez.
I am, of course, planning on sticking with the, well, you know, plan (6 days a week may be a little much but I will do everything I can).....but my overall goal here is to just start feeling better....inside and out. It took me 4 shirts Saturday night before my birthday dinner out with Chris before I finally just settled on something. Ugh. I am TIRED of feeling like that. So....here goes nothing.
In other news.......I am almost done with day 2 of 29. Last year of my 20s. I'll discuss more about that later....but I had a very good birthday, including a big Cowboys win! Yeah!
Also in other news, I now have 2 neices and/ or nephews in heaven. My poor SIL lost another one - we found out less than 2 weeks after we found out that she was pregnant again that this one had just stopped growing. It's all so hard to process and wrap your head around. We are in very similar, very scary, very hard situations - but at the very least, I know what she's going through, and I (to a point) know what she's going through. I can only pray that it happens for us both SOON!!! What makes it so much harder is knowing the first one would've been due in about 2 weeks.....but we will all be together for Thanksgiving which hopefully will help. My heart just breaks - for both of us.
Only 7 work days to get through before 4 days off work - I'm ready for a break - no matter how much of a whirlwind these holiday weekends always are.
Time to go lay down. On the floor. Happy November everyone!
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Monday, November 12, 2012
Friday, October 19, 2012
Horrible, No Good Person
I'm going to be an aunt in June. Hopefully this time around it is a better outcome than the last (as opposed to a miscarriage at 9 weeks, fetus was only 3 weeks)....but today they finally heard and saw the heartbeat and the baby is measuring at 6 weeks (although the calendar says about 9 weeks).
I heard the news from Chris and I burst into tears. And didn't stop crying for a good half hour. Fortunately, she knows how I feel and is sympathetic to what I'm going through and didn't call me this time. I did text her. I'm excited for her, but I am devastated for me.
I am a horrible, horrible person.
This isn't fair. I don't want to adopt a baby. I want my OWN. I was put on this earth to be a Mom. And not a Mom of someone else's baby, my own. I want a little piece of Chris and me walking around.
I'm just asking for one. That's all I want. I won't be greedy and ask for a 2nd one.
Just one happy, healthy baby. That's all I want. All I can think about.
I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of thinking about it. Tired of that sinking feeling in my heart everytime I see another baby picture or announcement on facebook, tired of feeling like an awful person b/c the first feeling I feel isn't happiness, it's sheer & utter jealousy and wanting.
But I can't help it. I wonder at what point it's time to just hang it up for awhile.
I don't know. I'm just sad. And I'm tired of saying "I'll be okay." or "I'll be fine."
Because I'm not. I'm not okay. I'm not fine.
I heard the news from Chris and I burst into tears. And didn't stop crying for a good half hour. Fortunately, she knows how I feel and is sympathetic to what I'm going through and didn't call me this time. I did text her. I'm excited for her, but I am devastated for me.
I am a horrible, horrible person.
This isn't fair. I don't want to adopt a baby. I want my OWN. I was put on this earth to be a Mom. And not a Mom of someone else's baby, my own. I want a little piece of Chris and me walking around.
I'm just asking for one. That's all I want. I won't be greedy and ask for a 2nd one.
Just one happy, healthy baby. That's all I want. All I can think about.
I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of thinking about it. Tired of that sinking feeling in my heart everytime I see another baby picture or announcement on facebook, tired of feeling like an awful person b/c the first feeling I feel isn't happiness, it's sheer & utter jealousy and wanting.
But I can't help it. I wonder at what point it's time to just hang it up for awhile.
I don't know. I'm just sad. And I'm tired of saying "I'll be okay." or "I'll be fine."
Because I'm not. I'm not okay. I'm not fine.
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Long Time No See
Sorry.
We haven't really been that busy lately (for once), but everytime I think about blogging, I just don't. Not much happening lately, either, except....
1. We are officially in the 10%. Go for big test #1 tomorrow and I am scared shitless. I'm tired of being upset month after month about this; now I am just pissed. And if one more person who HAS a child, or has been pregnant before tells me they "know what I'm going through," they're getting punched. NO, you do NOT know what I'm going through, YOU have a healthy, living, breathing baby. YOUR body has a clue what it's supposed to be doing. Mine does not. Chris has been checked out and is fine. So the rounds of tests begin. Prayers appreciated.
2. Our 10th HS Reunion came and went at the end of July - we didn't go. Out of a 400-person class, there were approximately 75 people RSVP'd, and of those 75 people, 50 of them still live in Terre Haute and all still hang out together anyway. I stay in touch with the few HS friends I need and want to (Chris had more friends in the classes above and below us than in our own); we didn't see the point in making a special trip home just to see the select few we hadn't seen in awhile when we can always make plans at our own convenience. With the emergence of social media like facebook (which came out right around the time of what would've been our 5-year reunion; that year we all came to a mass decision to not even have one - what was the point? Either everyone was just getting out of college or was still in school), everyone knows what is up with everyone (marriage, kids, jobs) and what everyone looks like. What other point is there to going to a HS Reunion? So anyway, we didn't go. Maybe for our 20th. I just can't believe we've been out of HS for 10 years already, and it was this time 10 years ago I was moving into LaFollette Hall at Ball State as a freshman. Oh, the good 'ole days....
3. A couple of weeks ago, my mom FINALLY went in to have a hernia fixed.....she has had it for almost 3 years now but has kept putting it off and putting off until she couldn't anymore - and then of course it was a surgical emergency. Geez. It was awful being 4 hours away, but they were able to do it as an outpatient surgery and she was home the same day, and Dad & Anthony were with her. Throughout the day I was posting updates on my facebook for the few friends and family who knew what was going on (no matter how minor it's scary when someone has to go under local anesesthia for anything that you love!) and I was literally overwhelmed with the amount of support from our friends - facebook messages, texts, etc. Thankfully everything went great and she's now back to her old self but it's amazing how even when minor things are happening you have the core group of friends who don't care WHAT is happening, they actually give a shit and go out of their way to make sure you know that.
4. Our 4th anniversary is 2 weeks from today (again, how??? Time....flies.....). Not many people (including us, some days) thought we'd make it to 1, let alone 4, so every anniversary is that much more special. We are going to stay in TH for a couple of nights the weekend of Labor Day and then head to St. Louis for a couple days by ourselves, and I'm just looking forward to being AWAY. I'm taking the entire week of Labor Day off - we'll be home by Wednesday, but I would've taken Thursday off anyway since Dallas plays that Wednesday night (thank you DNC for moving what has always been a Thursday night game to Wednesday). It'll be nice to actually use some vacation time to actually reLAX, and not have to use the time for appointments or driving or moving. I have 2 full weeks left until a week off and I can't wait.
5. Summer is coming to an end (oh yeah, my baby brother started his SENIOR year of HS Tuesday.....he got a new car over the weekend........I am in COMPLETE denial about this whole thing!) and I, admittedly, am ready for fall. Football season (of course), cooler weather (seriously over this heat and humidity), pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks, the holidays.....bring it all on! Except for the snow....that can stay the hell away. Work has been busy enough this year and I can't believe it's the middle of August already. Weren't we just closing 2011???
That's about it. Enjoy the storms, everyone!
We haven't really been that busy lately (for once), but everytime I think about blogging, I just don't. Not much happening lately, either, except....
1. We are officially in the 10%. Go for big test #1 tomorrow and I am scared shitless. I'm tired of being upset month after month about this; now I am just pissed. And if one more person who HAS a child, or has been pregnant before tells me they "know what I'm going through," they're getting punched. NO, you do NOT know what I'm going through, YOU have a healthy, living, breathing baby. YOUR body has a clue what it's supposed to be doing. Mine does not. Chris has been checked out and is fine. So the rounds of tests begin. Prayers appreciated.
2. Our 10th HS Reunion came and went at the end of July - we didn't go. Out of a 400-person class, there were approximately 75 people RSVP'd, and of those 75 people, 50 of them still live in Terre Haute and all still hang out together anyway. I stay in touch with the few HS friends I need and want to (Chris had more friends in the classes above and below us than in our own); we didn't see the point in making a special trip home just to see the select few we hadn't seen in awhile when we can always make plans at our own convenience. With the emergence of social media like facebook (which came out right around the time of what would've been our 5-year reunion; that year we all came to a mass decision to not even have one - what was the point? Either everyone was just getting out of college or was still in school), everyone knows what is up with everyone (marriage, kids, jobs) and what everyone looks like. What other point is there to going to a HS Reunion? So anyway, we didn't go. Maybe for our 20th. I just can't believe we've been out of HS for 10 years already, and it was this time 10 years ago I was moving into LaFollette Hall at Ball State as a freshman. Oh, the good 'ole days....
3. A couple of weeks ago, my mom FINALLY went in to have a hernia fixed.....she has had it for almost 3 years now but has kept putting it off and putting off until she couldn't anymore - and then of course it was a surgical emergency. Geez. It was awful being 4 hours away, but they were able to do it as an outpatient surgery and she was home the same day, and Dad & Anthony were with her. Throughout the day I was posting updates on my facebook for the few friends and family who knew what was going on (no matter how minor it's scary when someone has to go under local anesesthia for anything that you love!) and I was literally overwhelmed with the amount of support from our friends - facebook messages, texts, etc. Thankfully everything went great and she's now back to her old self but it's amazing how even when minor things are happening you have the core group of friends who don't care WHAT is happening, they actually give a shit and go out of their way to make sure you know that.
4. Our 4th anniversary is 2 weeks from today (again, how??? Time....flies.....). Not many people (including us, some days) thought we'd make it to 1, let alone 4, so every anniversary is that much more special. We are going to stay in TH for a couple of nights the weekend of Labor Day and then head to St. Louis for a couple days by ourselves, and I'm just looking forward to being AWAY. I'm taking the entire week of Labor Day off - we'll be home by Wednesday, but I would've taken Thursday off anyway since Dallas plays that Wednesday night (thank you DNC for moving what has always been a Thursday night game to Wednesday). It'll be nice to actually use some vacation time to actually reLAX, and not have to use the time for appointments or driving or moving. I have 2 full weeks left until a week off and I can't wait.
5. Summer is coming to an end (oh yeah, my baby brother started his SENIOR year of HS Tuesday.....he got a new car over the weekend........I am in COMPLETE denial about this whole thing!) and I, admittedly, am ready for fall. Football season (of course), cooler weather (seriously over this heat and humidity), pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks, the holidays.....bring it all on! Except for the snow....that can stay the hell away. Work has been busy enough this year and I can't believe it's the middle of August already. Weren't we just closing 2011???
That's about it. Enjoy the storms, everyone!
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Wednesday Brain Dump
I haven't done a brain dump in awhile. In fact, I think I gave it up after like 2.1 times of writing them....I suck. Oh well.......here goes.
1. Last couple of weeks have been whiny, crabby, cranky, and just generally pissed off at the world. At home, at work, on here....it hasn't been pretty. I apologize. The mix of the busiest spring in my history of springs at Brickman - my 4th one so far (partly due to all of my new responsibilities and partly due to the fact that we started mowing in MARCH), all the traveling I/ we've been doing (even the weekend we "got away" for a night was still one less day to get anything done around the house), and this whole baby business has just about put me in the damn loony bin. This week has been better, though. Catching up at work (kind of....and keep that quiet. Don't need anyone to know that I've actually had a free minute here and there to file AP and billing from......February??) and at home has made me more relaxed. Kind of.
2. Officially started my first round of Clomid on Saturday. I've gotten very saavy at all this fertility-talk which I'm not really that happy about (I'd much rather my body just do what it's supposed to without any real mental input from me, but that's not how this is going to work, apparently)....but my progesterone levels came back last month lower than they'd like, so that's what this med will do (force my body to actually ovulate, unlike what it hasn't been doing for 9 months now). Besides the side effects I've already dealt with (some nausea and oh-my-freaking-gosh-I-need-to-peel-off-my-skin-or-I-will-burn-alive hot flashes), it also raises your chances of twins by 10% or so. Chris was thrilled with that news, especially since twins run in my family anyway. We'll see.......the thought that this month could really be it (trying not to get my hopes up) is terrifying and exciting all at once. Stay tuned.....
3. Well, I say stay tuned, but we will not be telling ANYONE (outside of family and pertinent other people) if/ when that day comes until we are 11571% sure we have a real, live, healthy baby in there. Like....the 8 week appointment or even after that. Some sad news we got last week just confirmed my thought that telling people too early may not be a jinx (God's plan and all that), but it definitely just makes it that much harder and sadder to tell everyone if you lose the baby. Without going into too much detail, it turns out Chris and I WON'T be an aunt/ uncle again....not in November, anyway. It sucks and it's sad and I teared up on the phone with my SIL at work last Wednesday when I talked to her, and I just didn't know what to say (I know....there is nothing you CAN say). Like other people I know, she went in for her first "real" baby appointment....no heartbeat.....yup. So, it sucks that we live so far away and I feel awful for even having kind-of-sad/ jealous feelings when she told us all that she was pregnant.....but....sorry, friends. Any bun of mine will be nice and snuggled in for the long haul by the time anyone knows. So......pray for us, and pray for my SIL, ok? All 3 of you who read this....
4. We have 2 more days of this week to get through, then Chris & I are taking next Friday off, and then the following Monday is Memorial Day, which means a 4-day weekend and I CANNOT WAIT. We'll be going home to TH as always - Mom & Dad always have a big cookout for Anthony's bday/ the holiday and we'll be spending lots of time with family and traveling between houses, but I'm looking forward to some time away from work and just (hopefully) relaxing and taking our minds off everything. Who else can't believe it is MAY FREAKING 16TH ALREADY?!?
I think that's about all I've got for now. Going to cook dinner and eat on the patio.......l-o-ving this weather!
1. Last couple of weeks have been whiny, crabby, cranky, and just generally pissed off at the world. At home, at work, on here....it hasn't been pretty. I apologize. The mix of the busiest spring in my history of springs at Brickman - my 4th one so far (partly due to all of my new responsibilities and partly due to the fact that we started mowing in MARCH), all the traveling I/ we've been doing (even the weekend we "got away" for a night was still one less day to get anything done around the house), and this whole baby business has just about put me in the damn loony bin. This week has been better, though. Catching up at work (kind of....and keep that quiet. Don't need anyone to know that I've actually had a free minute here and there to file AP and billing from......February??) and at home has made me more relaxed. Kind of.
2. Officially started my first round of Clomid on Saturday. I've gotten very saavy at all this fertility-talk which I'm not really that happy about (I'd much rather my body just do what it's supposed to without any real mental input from me, but that's not how this is going to work, apparently)....but my progesterone levels came back last month lower than they'd like, so that's what this med will do (force my body to actually ovulate, unlike what it hasn't been doing for 9 months now). Besides the side effects I've already dealt with (some nausea and oh-my-freaking-gosh-I-need-to-peel-off-my-skin-or-I-will-burn-alive hot flashes), it also raises your chances of twins by 10% or so. Chris was thrilled with that news, especially since twins run in my family anyway. We'll see.......the thought that this month could really be it (trying not to get my hopes up) is terrifying and exciting all at once. Stay tuned.....
3. Well, I say stay tuned, but we will not be telling ANYONE (outside of family and pertinent other people) if/ when that day comes until we are 11571% sure we have a real, live, healthy baby in there. Like....the 8 week appointment or even after that. Some sad news we got last week just confirmed my thought that telling people too early may not be a jinx (God's plan and all that), but it definitely just makes it that much harder and sadder to tell everyone if you lose the baby. Without going into too much detail, it turns out Chris and I WON'T be an aunt/ uncle again....not in November, anyway. It sucks and it's sad and I teared up on the phone with my SIL at work last Wednesday when I talked to her, and I just didn't know what to say (I know....there is nothing you CAN say). Like other people I know, she went in for her first "real" baby appointment....no heartbeat.....yup. So, it sucks that we live so far away and I feel awful for even having kind-of-sad/ jealous feelings when she told us all that she was pregnant.....but....sorry, friends. Any bun of mine will be nice and snuggled in for the long haul by the time anyone knows. So......pray for us, and pray for my SIL, ok? All 3 of you who read this....
4. We have 2 more days of this week to get through, then Chris & I are taking next Friday off, and then the following Monday is Memorial Day, which means a 4-day weekend and I CANNOT WAIT. We'll be going home to TH as always - Mom & Dad always have a big cookout for Anthony's bday/ the holiday and we'll be spending lots of time with family and traveling between houses, but I'm looking forward to some time away from work and just (hopefully) relaxing and taking our minds off everything. Who else can't believe it is MAY FREAKING 16TH ALREADY?!?
I think that's about all I've got for now. Going to cook dinner and eat on the patio.......l-o-ving this weather!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Christmas Spirit
A lot of things have hindered my Christmas spirit this year.
We are on month 4 of trying to have a baby, with no luck so far. If one more person tells me to "relax, it'll happen in its own time," I'm going to FLIP OUT. That's like telling a little kid to NOT lick the frosting off a cupcake you put right in front of them and walk out of the room (lame analogy but all I could come up with on short notice). Don't tell me to relax. Don't tell me that "God has His own plans." I know all this. It's just frustrating, especially when it literally seems like everyone of any kind of relationship or acquaintance-ship to me is pregnant lately (including a 10-years older than me friend who has had her tubes tied...ectopic and very scary, but still? How does that happen???)......for the first time, for the 2nd time, for the 15th time.......ok, I kid on that last one. But when we started trying around our anniversary, I thought for sure everyone's Christmas present could be, "Surprise! You're going to be an aunt/ uncle/ cousin/ grandma/ grandpa again/ for the first time!" Not so much. Sigh. (Wallows in self-pity).
Money continues to be of short supply, but that's no different than any other day.
We moved in October and while we are 95% settled, there are always those 5% of boxes of random STUFF that need to be put away (or in our case, put UP on walls, etc). That being said, we have done ZERO decorating in our house for Christmas. Nothing. No lights, no tree, no wreath, no stockings. It just seems like so much work when he have everyday stuff that isn't even up yet. And to our defense, we came back after Thanksgiving weekend completely worn OUT. Were home for the 3rd and 4th but never got around to it. We were in Indy with friends last weekend. We're home this weekend, but at that point, what IS the point? We're leaving next Thursday night or Friday morning for Indiana. I rationalize it as we're not even HOME for Christmas and haven't been since we've been married.......maybe next year there will be a little reason to put up a tree!! (Crosses fingers).
Work is stressful (again, nothing new) awaiting snow and getting ready for 2012 (wait, 2012?!?!?).
I still have a lot of Christmas shopping left to do, if for no other reason than I've just been putting it off. I enjoy it, but it's like every weekend comes and I just find something else to do.
The Cowboys are doing their best to give me a heart attack week in and week out. Heart attacks when we end up with Ws = okay. Heart attacks when we end up giving games away = not okay.
But.
The last 4 days have done a lot to remedy my spiritlessness.
A little pat on my back here, so bear with me.....Sunday, I went to a Beef & Boards show in Indy with Chris' mom, sister &; grandma (PS - "Silent Night" gets me EVERYTIME). As Chris & I were waiting for them to come meet me (and him to head off to meet friends), we watched a large crowd of people walk in. One of them dropped cash. $125. In CASH. I ran after the crowd, asking several people if they had lost any money. No cigar (one telling me, "looks like you are $125 richer!" How? How would I spend that money??). So I wait until the show is over, go to the "main office" window. Ask if anyone had reported missing money. Yes, but had been found and returned. Huh. Must be different. Turn to walk away. Lady goes, "wait, how much was it?" I hesitated.....she asked, "$125?" I nod. Turns out, long story short, an older gentleman met his daughter at the show. He was scheduled to have some dental work done. He couldn't pay for it. Daughter hands him $125. Man loses money. Man is distraight. Daughter tells father that it's not a big deal, here's more money. Man refuses, doesn't want to take daughter's money again. Walks away. Daughter hands money to office, asking them to call the gentleman later telling him the money had been "found." They took her info just in case. The money I had got returned. I could have used that money, for sure. But how could I have spent that money knowing how upset (especially at this time of year!!) I would be if I lost $125? It at least got me a "God bless you" from an older lady who had overheard the exchange. :)
Then, tomorrow is my 4th Christmas party with Brickman. That meant the Food Drive I started back in 2008 was in its 4th year this year, and we dropped off today. 3,399 pounds donated, and that doesn't even count one of the branches. Last year's total? 1,397. I am SO PROUD of the people I work with. One of my supervisors (not even salaried) handed me $150 on Tuesday to go towards the mass shopping trip I did today. This kid is younger than me, married. I almost burst into tears when he explained that "My wife & I budgeted for this. This is half our grocery budget for the month; we can afford it. We're very blessed." I about fell over. When it was all said and done, my branch collected almost 1600 items. Absolutely amazed and a little proud, too. They say 1 pound equals 1 meal, generally, so we just fed about 4,000 people.
Babies will come. Cowboys will be my Cowboys. We'll never have enough money. Work will always be work. But day after day, year after year, I'm astounded at the generosity of others, and even proud of the way I was raised. We don't need decorations, or lights, or stockings hung to be thankful for the life we DO have. We don't have to depend on a food bank for our daily meals. We have enough money to buy little things for our loved ones. We are blessed by groups of friends who open their homes when we're coming in from out of town and always make time to see us for dinner, or drinks, or whatever, when we get to see each other, which isn't nearly often enough. We're going to be surrounded by those who love us most next weekend for Christmas, and I'll get to sit next to the people who mean the most to me in this world during Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve.
That's everything I need.
We are on month 4 of trying to have a baby, with no luck so far. If one more person tells me to "relax, it'll happen in its own time," I'm going to FLIP OUT. That's like telling a little kid to NOT lick the frosting off a cupcake you put right in front of them and walk out of the room (lame analogy but all I could come up with on short notice). Don't tell me to relax. Don't tell me that "God has His own plans." I know all this. It's just frustrating, especially when it literally seems like everyone of any kind of relationship or acquaintance-ship to me is pregnant lately (including a 10-years older than me friend who has had her tubes tied...ectopic and very scary, but still? How does that happen???)......for the first time, for the 2nd time, for the 15th time.......ok, I kid on that last one. But when we started trying around our anniversary, I thought for sure everyone's Christmas present could be, "Surprise! You're going to be an aunt/ uncle/ cousin/ grandma/ grandpa again/ for the first time!" Not so much. Sigh. (Wallows in self-pity).
Money continues to be of short supply, but that's no different than any other day.
We moved in October and while we are 95% settled, there are always those 5% of boxes of random STUFF that need to be put away (or in our case, put UP on walls, etc). That being said, we have done ZERO decorating in our house for Christmas. Nothing. No lights, no tree, no wreath, no stockings. It just seems like so much work when he have everyday stuff that isn't even up yet. And to our defense, we came back after Thanksgiving weekend completely worn OUT. Were home for the 3rd and 4th but never got around to it. We were in Indy with friends last weekend. We're home this weekend, but at that point, what IS the point? We're leaving next Thursday night or Friday morning for Indiana. I rationalize it as we're not even HOME for Christmas and haven't been since we've been married.......maybe next year there will be a little reason to put up a tree!! (Crosses fingers).
Work is stressful (again, nothing new) awaiting snow and getting ready for 2012 (wait, 2012?!?!?).
I still have a lot of Christmas shopping left to do, if for no other reason than I've just been putting it off. I enjoy it, but it's like every weekend comes and I just find something else to do.
The Cowboys are doing their best to give me a heart attack week in and week out. Heart attacks when we end up with Ws = okay. Heart attacks when we end up giving games away = not okay.
But.
The last 4 days have done a lot to remedy my spiritlessness.
A little pat on my back here, so bear with me.....Sunday, I went to a Beef & Boards show in Indy with Chris' mom, sister &; grandma (PS - "Silent Night" gets me EVERYTIME). As Chris & I were waiting for them to come meet me (and him to head off to meet friends), we watched a large crowd of people walk in. One of them dropped cash. $125. In CASH. I ran after the crowd, asking several people if they had lost any money. No cigar (one telling me, "looks like you are $125 richer!" How? How would I spend that money??). So I wait until the show is over, go to the "main office" window. Ask if anyone had reported missing money. Yes, but had been found and returned. Huh. Must be different. Turn to walk away. Lady goes, "wait, how much was it?" I hesitated.....she asked, "$125?" I nod. Turns out, long story short, an older gentleman met his daughter at the show. He was scheduled to have some dental work done. He couldn't pay for it. Daughter hands him $125. Man loses money. Man is distraight. Daughter tells father that it's not a big deal, here's more money. Man refuses, doesn't want to take daughter's money again. Walks away. Daughter hands money to office, asking them to call the gentleman later telling him the money had been "found." They took her info just in case. The money I had got returned. I could have used that money, for sure. But how could I have spent that money knowing how upset (especially at this time of year!!) I would be if I lost $125? It at least got me a "God bless you" from an older lady who had overheard the exchange. :)
Then, tomorrow is my 4th Christmas party with Brickman. That meant the Food Drive I started back in 2008 was in its 4th year this year, and we dropped off today. 3,399 pounds donated, and that doesn't even count one of the branches. Last year's total? 1,397. I am SO PROUD of the people I work with. One of my supervisors (not even salaried) handed me $150 on Tuesday to go towards the mass shopping trip I did today. This kid is younger than me, married. I almost burst into tears when he explained that "My wife & I budgeted for this. This is half our grocery budget for the month; we can afford it. We're very blessed." I about fell over. When it was all said and done, my branch collected almost 1600 items. Absolutely amazed and a little proud, too. They say 1 pound equals 1 meal, generally, so we just fed about 4,000 people.
Babies will come. Cowboys will be my Cowboys. We'll never have enough money. Work will always be work. But day after day, year after year, I'm astounded at the generosity of others, and even proud of the way I was raised. We don't need decorations, or lights, or stockings hung to be thankful for the life we DO have. We don't have to depend on a food bank for our daily meals. We have enough money to buy little things for our loved ones. We are blessed by groups of friends who open their homes when we're coming in from out of town and always make time to see us for dinner, or drinks, or whatever, when we get to see each other, which isn't nearly often enough. We're going to be surrounded by those who love us most next weekend for Christmas, and I'll get to sit next to the people who mean the most to me in this world during Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve.
That's everything I need.
Monday, September 19, 2011
The Last Month - By The Numbers
I haven't blogged in awhile. A lot has happened. I like numbers. That being said, as my little brother says, "leggo!"
3: number of years Chris & I celebrated 3 weeks ago tomorrow. 3 years already?!? It's hard to believe that that gorgeous, sunny day at the end of August in 2008 was 3 years ago. That also means that it has been 3 years since our glorious honeymoon in Jamaica (one of my fave pictures from that trip, left. Typical "Chris & Nikki picture" - Chris is not amused, I'm making up for it with a goofy face). We WILL get back there someday.......hopefully sooner rather than later!
10: years since the tragic attacks of 9/11/01. 10 years since just another normal Tuesday at good 'ole Terre Haute South, in my senior year, in my first hour classroom with Ms. Minar (Newspaper). I was calling local radio stations in a small room off the classroom to see if we could get some airtime about a carwash, when a DJ rudely hung up on me, informing me that they were "more worried about our country at the moment." Laughing, I walked back into the classroom, talking about what a jerk that DJ had been. At that moment, someone had turned on the classroom TV (was there a PA announcement? I can't remember), and somehow, it was turned on just in time for us to see the 2nd plane hit. I remember what I was wearing (dark blue jeans from Pac Sun and a dark red Aeropostale hoodie that belonged to a cousin of my boyfriend), I remember my jaw dropping, I remember having the feeling of such disbelief, of such helplessness as we started seeing people jump to their deaths. It was truly this generation's defining moment, much like our parents & parents' parents remember the assassination of JFK. The 10 year anniversary of that tragic day also means Chris & I's 10th HS Reunion is coming up, probably in late spring of 2012. How is that possible?! Hes already informed we're not going. We'll see. :)
2: games that the Cowboys have played so far in the regular season
2: games that have nearly given me heart attacks; fortunately, the game in SF yesterday turned out better than the game that we *%)(^$&^*@^%^)!$ gave away to the New York Jets last Sunday night. They better be ready for next Monday night against NFCE rival Redskins, because my blood pressure really can't handle it. Thankfully, that game will be at Cowboys Stadium for the home opener (of course they've been on both coasts already to open the season). Hopefully, Romo's rib & lung (punctured lung yesterday and he still played??!?) heal up enough to play Monday night b/c we'll need him!!!!
1: wedding we've attended - Chris' sister was married on 9/10 (yes, they realized it would be 9/10/11), and it was a beautiful wedding. Dramatic, petty & immature bridesmaid aside (the "other" SIL), it was a really wonderful day. Jenn had been married before - back when Chris & I had started dating in July of 2003. Jenn was only 20 that summer, and that wedding just had a completely different feel than the one she just had. It was her new husband's first wedding, and his family really went as "all out" as they could. They were just so happy and just got back from their honeymoon in Montego Bay Saturday. Congrats Mr. & Mrs. Stephens!
It is going to be a blazing fast next 6 weeks. We have 2 free weekends, and then literally not a free moment until November. 10/8 I will be in TH running in the same 5K I did last year (all proceeds going to Concerns Of Police Survivors - COPS - this year it will have truly significant meaning with the tragic death of 30-year old Police Officer Brent Long from THPD earlier this year). 10/15, Chris' fraternity brother & his wife Katie are coming over to visit. 10/22, Chris' parents will be here. 10/29.......we are moving. To where, you ask? Oh.....no idea yet. We just know our lease is up 10/31, and we signed our official notice of vacating Saturday. Enough with these apartments. Hopefully, we'll find a house to rent, b/c I am tired of apartment living.
Fall is here, I love it, I just hate what comes next. Hoodies, football & cider, oh my! ;-)
2: games that the Cowboys have played so far in the regular season
2: games that have nearly given me heart attacks; fortunately, the game in SF yesterday turned out better than the game that we *%)(^$&^*@^%^)!$ gave away to the New York Jets last Sunday night. They better be ready for next Monday night against NFCE rival Redskins, because my blood pressure really can't handle it. Thankfully, that game will be at Cowboys Stadium for the home opener (of course they've been on both coasts already to open the season). Hopefully, Romo's rib & lung (punctured lung yesterday and he still played??!?) heal up enough to play Monday night b/c we'll need him!!!!
1: wedding we've attended - Chris' sister was married on 9/10 (yes, they realized it would be 9/10/11), and it was a beautiful wedding. Dramatic, petty & immature bridesmaid aside (the "other" SIL), it was a really wonderful day. Jenn had been married before - back when Chris & I had started dating in July of 2003. Jenn was only 20 that summer, and that wedding just had a completely different feel than the one she just had. It was her new husband's first wedding, and his family really went as "all out" as they could. They were just so happy and just got back from their honeymoon in Montego Bay Saturday. Congrats Mr. & Mrs. Stephens!
It is going to be a blazing fast next 6 weeks. We have 2 free weekends, and then literally not a free moment until November. 10/8 I will be in TH running in the same 5K I did last year (all proceeds going to Concerns Of Police Survivors - COPS - this year it will have truly significant meaning with the tragic death of 30-year old Police Officer Brent Long from THPD earlier this year). 10/15, Chris' fraternity brother & his wife Katie are coming over to visit. 10/22, Chris' parents will be here. 10/29.......we are moving. To where, you ask? Oh.....no idea yet. We just know our lease is up 10/31, and we signed our official notice of vacating Saturday. Enough with these apartments. Hopefully, we'll find a house to rent, b/c I am tired of apartment living.
Fall is here, I love it, I just hate what comes next. Hoodies, football & cider, oh my! ;-)
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Frustration
I'm frustrated. I'm frustrated and angry and annoyed with myself, and there's no one to blame BUT myself. Last March, I decided I had had it with my appearance. I started watching what I ate - still eating everything I wanted, but in smaller portions. I counted everything that went in my mouth - which was good b/c I love numbers (who knew?) and was able to make it a game everyday. I did really really well. I eventually got down to 8 pounds below my wedding day weight and only about 16 pounds from where I see my realistic goal weight being.
Enter vacation. Vacation was great. A whole week in the Outer Banks, and I had never felt better about myself in a two-piece.
Enter post-vacation. Holidays and cold weather came and I had nothing to hold myself accountable for.
Enter now.
All of that weight is back. It's back! I'm disgusted with myself. Disgusted. I know how to do it. I know how to control my portions. But yet everytime I have a meal I feel like I am seeing food for the last time. Why!? I've tried to get back on the wagon a few times in the last couple of months but I just fall right off.
What the f. Seriously.
Willpower. That's what it takes. There is no quick fix (contrary to some who think there is) - it is literally your calories IN MUST be LESS than your calories OUT. That's it. I proved it last year! My mom has proven it over the last 4 years.
So, no current solutions. Just annoyed and sad when every morning I look at all my pants and capris and shorts and know that I can't fit into half of them. Or 90% of them. I'm just in "that place" right now, and it sickens me. I need to get OUT.
Secondly, and I'm going here b/c this is where I get to use this as a true journal and not just a superficial place to skim over the tops of my thoughts, so read if you will. No judging allowed. Dipshit got married this weekend (last I heard). If I had to pinpoint a single feeling about it, I couldn't. I couldn't. It's like if you mix all the colors in the rainbow up, that's what I would be. Sad, happy, ecstatic, relieved, pissed off, annoyed, pensive, hopeful. Add all those up and that's how I feel about it. It has been over a 16 months since everything blew up and ended, and that is a GOOD thing. Seriously. A good thing. It's just - I don't know how to explain it in a public place like without sounding like an idiot or that I'm still pining for him - because I'm not. I guess I just wish him well, but at the same time I know that a relationship that was started on a lie (he divorced his first wife b/c of this girl....and we all know where that relationship has been since they've been together) can't and won't end well. So that's what all I'll say.
Anyway, my parents' 30th wedding anniversary was this weekend. That's how long Chris and I have been married so far.......times 10. *!!!!!!* My sister and I collaborated over the last month to throw them a surprise get together at a restaurant in Terre Haute and it turned out really well. Well, as good as a party can turn out with peach and yellow as its colors!! :)
Enter vacation. Vacation was great. A whole week in the Outer Banks, and I had never felt better about myself in a two-piece.
Enter post-vacation. Holidays and cold weather came and I had nothing to hold myself accountable for.
Enter now.
All of that weight is back. It's back! I'm disgusted with myself. Disgusted. I know how to do it. I know how to control my portions. But yet everytime I have a meal I feel like I am seeing food for the last time. Why!? I've tried to get back on the wagon a few times in the last couple of months but I just fall right off.
What the f. Seriously.
Willpower. That's what it takes. There is no quick fix (contrary to some who think there is) - it is literally your calories IN MUST be LESS than your calories OUT. That's it. I proved it last year! My mom has proven it over the last 4 years.
So, no current solutions. Just annoyed and sad when every morning I look at all my pants and capris and shorts and know that I can't fit into half of them. Or 90% of them. I'm just in "that place" right now, and it sickens me. I need to get OUT.
Secondly, and I'm going here b/c this is where I get to use this as a true journal and not just a superficial place to skim over the tops of my thoughts, so read if you will. No judging allowed. Dipshit got married this weekend (last I heard). If I had to pinpoint a single feeling about it, I couldn't. I couldn't. It's like if you mix all the colors in the rainbow up, that's what I would be. Sad, happy, ecstatic, relieved, pissed off, annoyed, pensive, hopeful. Add all those up and that's how I feel about it. It has been over a 16 months since everything blew up and ended, and that is a GOOD thing. Seriously. A good thing. It's just - I don't know how to explain it in a public place like without sounding like an idiot or that I'm still pining for him - because I'm not. I guess I just wish him well, but at the same time I know that a relationship that was started on a lie (he divorced his first wife b/c of this girl....and we all know where that relationship has been since they've been together) can't and won't end well. So that's what all I'll say.
Anyway, my parents' 30th wedding anniversary was this weekend. That's how long Chris and I have been married so far.......times 10. *!!!!!!* My sister and I collaborated over the last month to throw them a surprise get together at a restaurant in Terre Haute and it turned out really well. Well, as good as a party can turn out with peach and yellow as its colors!! :) People still tick me off with their complete lack of etiquette and literally nobody from my dad's step-family (who've been our "step family" for longer than I've been alive) showed up, let alone responded. Whatever.
Good thing that the people who came were all wonderful and I think my mom & dad were really pleased. Aren't they cute? Yes, we made them do a cake cutting ceremony :) Dad was less than thrilled, but Megan & I looked on like proud parents and took pictures!
Work is also frustrating right now, but fortunately I don't dread going in everyday like I did before - my boss is absolutely fantastic. It's just like it never ends. I get my arms around one thing and then another thing blows up. Tired. So, so tired.
Anyway. I've been a Negative Nancy lately. Sorry. I just need to get over myself and get on with it. There a lot of exciting things coming up soon and I want to enjoy them all!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Dad
So, in the middle of my branch's month-end close last Friday, I look down and see a text from my Mom.
"Dad is out....very loopy but all is good to go!"
Huh?
Oh yeah. I knew that he was going in for a colonscopy last Friday, but it had slipped my mind (I suck as a daughter. Could also be becuase sometimes I am ultra aware of my own - and therefore my own parents' mortality. I know that my mom has always said that a parent should never have to bury their child, but I think it's just as cruel as a child burying a parent, at least before that child is at least 90....so therefore I try to push scary things like out of my mind. Childish? Probably). I immediately texted back telling my mom to give Dad a kiss for me and that I'd talk to her later, and that I was glad everything was okay.
Leave it to my Dad. The very Monday after he turned 50, he was on the phone with his doctor, scheduling what I don't really think is the most comfortable of procedures; one that most doctors have to prod and corral their patients into with threats and statistics.
My Dad is one of the most health conscious guys you'll meet. He doesn't eat the best stuff for him all the time, but he's super aware of eating vegetables and his fiber and all that stuff. He runs whenever he can and lifts weights on his way into the house everyday from work. But he is terrified of being one of those stories....one that just scares me to death to even think, but isn't it always the case? That guy at the grocery store, loading up his cart with chips and Mighty Man (Hungry Man?) meals and ice cream.....with a pack of cigarettes checking out.....that will live til he's 115. Healthy guys, guys with 6 or 10% body fat, with perfectly good hearts and what have you......well, they don't.
Chris lost his dad when he was 2 days shy of 10 years old. I know Chris thinks about him everyday, and we sometimes talk about his dad. What was he like? Was he funny? Did he tell good stories? What is your favorite memory of him? How have you felt on some of the biggest days of your life, him not being there - graduation, our wedding day........how will you feel when we have our first child?
I can't imagine my life without my Dad. And so for another 10 years at least, we don't have to worry about his colon. :) Everything else - well, that's in God's hands. But surely God knows what a troublemaker my Dad is.........he just takes the good ones early, right?
I kid, and I'm being flippant about a very serious thing. So I'll leave it at this. Thank God my Dad is around for awhile longer.
"Dad is out....very loopy but all is good to go!"
Huh?
Oh yeah. I knew that he was going in for a colonscopy last Friday, but it had slipped my mind (I suck as a daughter. Could also be becuase sometimes I am ultra aware of my own - and therefore my own parents' mortality. I know that my mom has always said that a parent should never have to bury their child, but I think it's just as cruel as a child burying a parent, at least before that child is at least 90....so therefore I try to push scary things like out of my mind. Childish? Probably). I immediately texted back telling my mom to give Dad a kiss for me and that I'd talk to her later, and that I was glad everything was okay.
Leave it to my Dad. The very Monday after he turned 50, he was on the phone with his doctor, scheduling what I don't really think is the most comfortable of procedures; one that most doctors have to prod and corral their patients into with threats and statistics.
My Dad is one of the most health conscious guys you'll meet. He doesn't eat the best stuff for him all the time, but he's super aware of eating vegetables and his fiber and all that stuff. He runs whenever he can and lifts weights on his way into the house everyday from work. But he is terrified of being one of those stories....one that just scares me to death to even think, but isn't it always the case? That guy at the grocery store, loading up his cart with chips and Mighty Man (Hungry Man?) meals and ice cream.....with a pack of cigarettes checking out.....that will live til he's 115. Healthy guys, guys with 6 or 10% body fat, with perfectly good hearts and what have you......well, they don't.
Chris lost his dad when he was 2 days shy of 10 years old. I know Chris thinks about him everyday, and we sometimes talk about his dad. What was he like? Was he funny? Did he tell good stories? What is your favorite memory of him? How have you felt on some of the biggest days of your life, him not being there - graduation, our wedding day........how will you feel when we have our first child?
I can't imagine my life without my Dad. And so for another 10 years at least, we don't have to worry about his colon. :) Everything else - well, that's in God's hands. But surely God knows what a troublemaker my Dad is.........he just takes the good ones early, right?
I kid, and I'm being flippant about a very serious thing. So I'll leave it at this. Thank God my Dad is around for awhile longer.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Siblings
I became a big sister when I was 3 years and 3 months old. I don't remember Megan being born or holding her for the first time, but I do remember that when she came home, people came to see her and brought me presents - to this day I still remember a plastic chain-link red necklace that you could buy different "charms" for, along with some tiny slinky-like bracelets - pretty cool stuff to a 3-year old! Sure, I'll take the crying, wailing, takes-all-of-mom's-time thing if you keep the presents comin'! :)
Fast forward another 8 years. I became a big sister for the 2nd time at the age of 11. I don't remember as many presents that time around, but I do remember sneaking out of the house while Dad slept with Megan to buy ingredients at the corner store to make some "welcome home Mom & Anthony" cookies (snickerdoodles). Dad was PISSED. He got over it.
The next 7-9 years were tumultous ones with my siblings, moreso with my sister than with Anthony. Megan always wanted to butt in on me and my friends, wanted to wear my clothes, stole my shoes, used my makeup, and generally did all those things that I know now were forms of "flattery" but then those acts were enough to spark some pretty major fights. I did some pretty mean things to her as a know-it-all big sister and cringe at some of those memories. Yeesh, I was mean.
But.
Fast forward another 8 years or so. My sister is one of my best friends, a major confidante, a shoulder to cry on. There is no secret of mine that she doesn't know. And yesterday, she sends me a one-line email:
"Hi. I just wanted to tell you that I miss you. Alot. And I love you."
At work. I burst into tears (okay, not sobbing uncontrollably tears, but enough to make me tear up and get all blotchy). I had to actually leave for lunch to chill myself out.
And then today, I posted a HARD HARD HARD 45-minute run on facebook, and Anthony comments, "There ya go sis." (When I lived at home between Muncie and our wedding, he and I would run together 2-3 times a week; at the time he was only 13 and I had to push myself to keep up with him!)
I sometimes forget what an honor it is to be a big sister. Not everyone gets to have younger siblings. But there are days like yesterday, and today, that I am reminded of how grateful I am.
Fast forward another 8 years. I became a big sister for the 2nd time at the age of 11. I don't remember as many presents that time around, but I do remember sneaking out of the house while Dad slept with Megan to buy ingredients at the corner store to make some "welcome home Mom & Anthony" cookies (snickerdoodles). Dad was PISSED. He got over it.
The next 7-9 years were tumultous ones with my siblings, moreso with my sister than with Anthony. Megan always wanted to butt in on me and my friends, wanted to wear my clothes, stole my shoes, used my makeup, and generally did all those things that I know now were forms of "flattery" but then those acts were enough to spark some pretty major fights. I did some pretty mean things to her as a know-it-all big sister and cringe at some of those memories. Yeesh, I was mean.
But.
Fast forward another 8 years or so. My sister is one of my best friends, a major confidante, a shoulder to cry on. There is no secret of mine that she doesn't know. And yesterday, she sends me a one-line email:
"Hi. I just wanted to tell you that I miss you. Alot. And I love you."
At work. I burst into tears (okay, not sobbing uncontrollably tears, but enough to make me tear up and get all blotchy). I had to actually leave for lunch to chill myself out.
And then today, I posted a HARD HARD HARD 45-minute run on facebook, and Anthony comments, "There ya go sis." (When I lived at home between Muncie and our wedding, he and I would run together 2-3 times a week; at the time he was only 13 and I had to push myself to keep up with him!)
I sometimes forget what an honor it is to be a big sister. Not everyone gets to have younger siblings. But there are days like yesterday, and today, that I am reminded of how grateful I am.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Deck the Halls - Christmas 2010
To keep myself on track, I'm going to stick with the format of my last holiday format.....
C is for car. 500 + miles in our car between Wednesday night and Sunday night. It's 230 miles from our front door to my parents', and then between running in between Chris' parents' house and mine, plus driving out to my Nana's in Marshall Illinois, we probably put closer to over 600 miles on my poor Malibu (nearing 140,000 miles very rapidly). That will be a perk when we start having kids. People will have to come to us!
H is for.....H is for.........husband! We actually exchanged gifts this year for the 1st time since we've been married (the first year we did "joint gifts" and last year I don't think we really did much of anything....his theory, and kind of mine too, is that we have joint money now, so we can just go buy our own stuff.....but we never do). We set a budget and I went a little over, but I had a lot of fun picking stuff out for him. I got him a couple hats, a box full of OSU gear, and a really nice Izod golf shirt. I have another thing, but I'm still working on it, so shhh...........he yelled at me for going over, but then I open mine and he did so well! He picked out some cold weather running clothes (Danskin from Walmart - just as good as Nike or Under Armour) for me, some good running headphones (nothing drives me crazier or distracts me more than wires all over the place and headphones that fall out of my ears), and a beautiful ring/ pendant/ earring set from Helzberg. I had really just wanted a ring for my right hand, but he went above and beyond :o) It's a light blue color which really has no meaning other than it's his birthstone (March), so I think of him everytime I see it!
R is for Ridiculous. Cowboys game Christmas night. Down 21-3. Came back to go ahead 26-24 with 1:41 to go. Missed the EXTRA POINT (as my friend Sarah would say, Jesus needed earmuffs). Defense made some huge stops and all we had to do was stop them on 4th and 15 (FOURTH AND FIFTEEN)!!!!!!!! and we couldn't. Cardinals go down the field and Jay Feely kicks one right down the middle with 0:05 to go to win 27-24. We suck.
I is for I LOVE MY FAMILY. Christmas has never been overly extravagant in our household, and I know that my mom & dad wish they could do more, but honestly? Anthony was on facebook and saw that one of friends had gotten (among other things) an Austin Collie authentic jersey (easily $150) and a PLASMA tv - and he's 15. Seriously? That's great for the people who can afford it, but I know so many people who go into debt over the holidays, and that just is so missing the whole point. My mom and dad have always made Christmas special - whether it always means putting apples & oranges in the bottoms of our stockings (we've all had the same ones since we were born), or all of us having a big "Santa" gift and the rest from mom and dad - I feel like no matter how much or how little my parents have, they always make sure Christmas is special for us. In the last couple of years, we've all been together at our house and watched a movie before Midnight Mass.........and then we all go to Midnight Mass together, which has become a really special time together.
S is for Scrapbooking! "Santa" brought me a huge "scrapbook starter kit" for Christmas, and I'm excited to get started! I took a lot of pictures all throughout college and since we've been married, but the only evidence of them is on facebook. I think I'm going to start with something creatively "easy" - our wedding. Wedding-themed paper and stickers, etc are pretty easy to find, and although Mom & Dad got us a book from snapfish of a bunch of pictures, I'd like to include a program, an invite and some other random "momentos" from the occasion. I have a BOX full of stuff that I've been quite sure what to do with (wedding cards, flower petals, leftover stickers from the candy) - so now I can put it to paper and throw out the rest (maybe not the wedding cards, though. My parents still have all of theirs and I think that's kind of neat)!!
T is for new Traditions.....every year since I was born, my mom's side of the family has gotten together on Christmas Day - my aunts, uncles and all of my cousins. Well, the oldest cousin (Kristi) is now almost 28; the youngest (Anthony) is 15, and there are now 3 littler cousins (Michael's 2 boys, Gabe & Jason; Kristi's little girl, Ava) - and last year's get-together was a madhouse. So, this year, each family "unit" did their own thing. It was nice just being my mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, brother, hubby & me, but it was kind of sad to break a 20+ year tradition. Hopefully in a few years the hubby and I will start some new traditions of our own with our own family :-)
M is for Mother-in-Law....she's so funny!! We had gone shopping together on Black Friday where I picked out all of my husband's and brother- and sister-in-law's presents....well, she went back out the same day after we were done to pick up a bunch of the stuff that I had oohed and ahhed over! There were some earrings from JCP that I had actually picked up to buy but put down - she got them - and then this 24-opening photo collage from Kohl's that she got me, too, along with a lot of other stuff (Cowboys scarf/ socks, Bath & Body Works stuff, a gorgeous sweater, and some frames from IKEA). Our relationship has really changed for the better this year, and it's pretty cool.
A is for Anthony.........my brother.........my all of 6'3" brother who is 15......nothing much to say about him except for my grandpa brought over the little newspaper clipping from his 1st Christmas and I about burst into tears. He's a spoiled brat and I know that I had a lot to do with it.....he's just growing up so fast, and it's hard to believe that this time 7 or 8 years ago he still believed in Santa :-( He was still just as excited with all of his presents as a little kid though (a new DROID! from Nana, and all kinds of Oregon Duck stuff from our parents....not as excited over his letter jacket as Megan & I were when we got ours as sophomores, but still kind of surreal to see him with '13 on his sleeve!!)
S is for Stupidity............it seems a new tradition within my family is to lock ourselves out of places (when we had our girls' weekend in Indy, Dad & Anthony locked themselves out of the house)...........I went to my aunt's to see my cousins (and Ava!).....was in a hurry and just wanted to run in, grab a few pictures, and leave. Well, out of habit, I locked my car when I got out.....when I had thrown my keys in my purse on the front seat. Fortunately, my uncle came to the rescue with a wire coat hanger and I didn't have to pay a locksmith on Christmas weekend! Note to self: get Chris a spare!
Okay, so what each letter was for was kind of lame, but overall, we had a really nice Christmas. Very busy, very out of my routine (and I'm kind of like a 2-year old when I'm out of my routine too long), but a lot of time with family and each other. Christmas decorations are coming down as we speak - I'm ready to get back to normal!!! Thank goodness for Thursday & Friday off this week..........I need it to recover!
C is for car. 500 + miles in our car between Wednesday night and Sunday night. It's 230 miles from our front door to my parents', and then between running in between Chris' parents' house and mine, plus driving out to my Nana's in Marshall Illinois, we probably put closer to over 600 miles on my poor Malibu (nearing 140,000 miles very rapidly). That will be a perk when we start having kids. People will have to come to us!
H is for.....H is for.........husband! We actually exchanged gifts this year for the 1st time since we've been married (the first year we did "joint gifts" and last year I don't think we really did much of anything....his theory, and kind of mine too, is that we have joint money now, so we can just go buy our own stuff.....but we never do). We set a budget and I went a little over, but I had a lot of fun picking stuff out for him. I got him a couple hats, a box full of OSU gear, and a really nice Izod golf shirt. I have another thing, but I'm still working on it, so shhh...........he yelled at me for going over, but then I open mine and he did so well! He picked out some cold weather running clothes (Danskin from Walmart - just as good as Nike or Under Armour) for me, some good running headphones (nothing drives me crazier or distracts me more than wires all over the place and headphones that fall out of my ears), and a beautiful ring/ pendant/ earring set from Helzberg. I had really just wanted a ring for my right hand, but he went above and beyond :o) It's a light blue color which really has no meaning other than it's his birthstone (March), so I think of him everytime I see it!
R is for Ridiculous. Cowboys game Christmas night. Down 21-3. Came back to go ahead 26-24 with 1:41 to go. Missed the EXTRA POINT (as my friend Sarah would say, Jesus needed earmuffs). Defense made some huge stops and all we had to do was stop them on 4th and 15 (FOURTH AND FIFTEEN)!!!!!!!! and we couldn't. Cardinals go down the field and Jay Feely kicks one right down the middle with 0:05 to go to win 27-24. We suck.
I is for I LOVE MY FAMILY. Christmas has never been overly extravagant in our household, and I know that my mom & dad wish they could do more, but honestly? Anthony was on facebook and saw that one of friends had gotten (among other things) an Austin Collie authentic jersey (easily $150) and a PLASMA tv - and he's 15. Seriously? That's great for the people who can afford it, but I know so many people who go into debt over the holidays, and that just is so missing the whole point. My mom and dad have always made Christmas special - whether it always means putting apples & oranges in the bottoms of our stockings (we've all had the same ones since we were born), or all of us having a big "Santa" gift and the rest from mom and dad - I feel like no matter how much or how little my parents have, they always make sure Christmas is special for us. In the last couple of years, we've all been together at our house and watched a movie before Midnight Mass.........and then we all go to Midnight Mass together, which has become a really special time together.
S is for Scrapbooking! "Santa" brought me a huge "scrapbook starter kit" for Christmas, and I'm excited to get started! I took a lot of pictures all throughout college and since we've been married, but the only evidence of them is on facebook. I think I'm going to start with something creatively "easy" - our wedding. Wedding-themed paper and stickers, etc are pretty easy to find, and although Mom & Dad got us a book from snapfish of a bunch of pictures, I'd like to include a program, an invite and some other random "momentos" from the occasion. I have a BOX full of stuff that I've been quite sure what to do with (wedding cards, flower petals, leftover stickers from the candy) - so now I can put it to paper and throw out the rest (maybe not the wedding cards, though. My parents still have all of theirs and I think that's kind of neat)!!
T is for new Traditions.....every year since I was born, my mom's side of the family has gotten together on Christmas Day - my aunts, uncles and all of my cousins. Well, the oldest cousin (Kristi) is now almost 28; the youngest (Anthony) is 15, and there are now 3 littler cousins (Michael's 2 boys, Gabe & Jason; Kristi's little girl, Ava) - and last year's get-together was a madhouse. So, this year, each family "unit" did their own thing. It was nice just being my mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, brother, hubby & me, but it was kind of sad to break a 20+ year tradition. Hopefully in a few years the hubby and I will start some new traditions of our own with our own family :-)
M is for Mother-in-Law....she's so funny!! We had gone shopping together on Black Friday where I picked out all of my husband's and brother- and sister-in-law's presents....well, she went back out the same day after we were done to pick up a bunch of the stuff that I had oohed and ahhed over! There were some earrings from JCP that I had actually picked up to buy but put down - she got them - and then this 24-opening photo collage from Kohl's that she got me, too, along with a lot of other stuff (Cowboys scarf/ socks, Bath & Body Works stuff, a gorgeous sweater, and some frames from IKEA). Our relationship has really changed for the better this year, and it's pretty cool.
A is for Anthony.........my brother.........my all of 6'3" brother who is 15......nothing much to say about him except for my grandpa brought over the little newspaper clipping from his 1st Christmas and I about burst into tears. He's a spoiled brat and I know that I had a lot to do with it.....he's just growing up so fast, and it's hard to believe that this time 7 or 8 years ago he still believed in Santa :-( He was still just as excited with all of his presents as a little kid though (a new DROID! from Nana, and all kinds of Oregon Duck stuff from our parents....not as excited over his letter jacket as Megan & I were when we got ours as sophomores, but still kind of surreal to see him with '13 on his sleeve!!)
S is for Stupidity............it seems a new tradition within my family is to lock ourselves out of places (when we had our girls' weekend in Indy, Dad & Anthony locked themselves out of the house)...........I went to my aunt's to see my cousins (and Ava!).....was in a hurry and just wanted to run in, grab a few pictures, and leave. Well, out of habit, I locked my car when I got out.....when I had thrown my keys in my purse on the front seat. Fortunately, my uncle came to the rescue with a wire coat hanger and I didn't have to pay a locksmith on Christmas weekend! Note to self: get Chris a spare!
Okay, so what each letter was for was kind of lame, but overall, we had a really nice Christmas. Very busy, very out of my routine (and I'm kind of like a 2-year old when I'm out of my routine too long), but a lot of time with family and each other. Christmas decorations are coming down as we speak - I'm ready to get back to normal!!! Thank goodness for Thursday & Friday off this week..........I need it to recover!
Monday, December 13, 2010
Girls Weekend
What a FUN weekend!
We've been planning this weekend for months. Nana and all of Papa Gene's girls went up to the Mall of America back in October - so this was our side of family's turn for some fun :) Thanks to Nana, we had a suite on the 8th floor of the Hilton that was right downtown. We all met up on Friday night -
- walked around Monument Circle (it was a gorgeous night for being "touristy"- brisk but not bone chilling, clear and just a nice winter night) -
and ate dinner at Buca di Beppo's. (Do you see the 2 people behind my Nana & me? They were celebrating their upcoming wedding and Megan & I weren't sure that they realized they weren't on their honeymoon yet. EW).
Saturday, we were up and at 'em early - Circle City Mall was a block away (which was a good thing, Mom & I brought armloads of bags back halfway through the day) and we shopped and shopped and shopped......its been a long time since I've been there and we had a lot of fun!
Saturday night, Nana had gotten us a table at Beef n' Boards for their Christmas show, and while I wasn't that impressed by the food, the show was REALLY good. It was a lot of fun and really entertaining. They had singers, dancers, tap dancers, 2 little girls that were sisters and cuter than you could imagine. We all left high on holiday spirit that night. The best part of the whole show was when the emcee opened a number by asking all veterans and active members of the military to stand so they could be recongized by applause.....but then he pointed out a young man in a sailor's uniform who had just gotten back from Afghanistan within the last few days. He got a standing ovation. It was seriously one of the most beautiful, goose-bump-making, wonderful moments. When the emcee said, "Now THAT is how every member of the armed services should be welcomed home," we all heartily agreed. It was amazing.Yesterday, we woke up, had a quick brunch at Cracker Barrel and all hit the road to get home before too much more snow fell. I made it home in really good time with no major bumps, and so did Mom, Megan & Nana back to Terre Haute. Megan actually ended up in a ditch on her way back to KY, but some road angels let her sit in their warm van while she waited for a tow truck, and they even paid to get her car towed out of the ditch. Stories like that remind me that not everyone is a complete shithead...........(and I'm only half kidding. I know. My attitude stinks).
It was such a fun weekend to spend with my family. I'm so blessed to have them.
And a few more of my fave pics from our fun time.........
Megan & I and our freshly baked Nestle Tollhouse cookies....YUM!
Love this picture of my momma, me and my sister. We had such a good time!Sunday, December 5, 2010
Weekend Recap
This weekend ended a lot better than it began.
I slept a LONG time Friday night, and I couldn't have needed it more. I'm still trying to stave off this cold or whatever is trying to take over, but lots of sleep in the last 2 nights, lots of water, and lots of day/nyquil have helped.
Yesterday, Chris didn't get off until 2....we went to a late lunch and we came back so he could take a nap. For the first time in....????? 2 years at least?, I went to Confession (Reconciliation) at St. Brendans. The Msgr. "running the show" was so nice and supportive and kind. I was a mess. A sniffling, somber, remorseful, MESS. I wasn't in there but maybe 5 minutes, but was able to come out to a darkened, candlelit church (Mass getting ready to start within the next hour) and kneel by myself, in silence, and just BE. I think when some people hear other people say "I felt God with me," it sounds cheesy........but there isn't a single other feeling I can even put into words. All at once, I just felt such peace. Lightened. What I've done in the past, the big things and little things.........it was just such an amazing experience for me and I'm glad I went. I also went to Mass last night for the first time in a long time for the 2nd Sunday of Advent, and I'm glad I did that, too.
Last night, Chris & I went out to dinner and came back home and watched Valentine's Day that he had DVR'd. I heard a lot of people that didn't like that movie, but I thought it was really cute! I still can't believe how many big names were in there.
Today, I slept late again, we went to grab lunch, went grocery shopping, and came back to watch my 3-8 Cowboys BEAT the 6-5 Colts!! Outside of Dallas' division rivals, I hate the Colts more than any other team in the league (95% of my Colts' fan acquaintances being why.....seriously, look up bandwagon and you'll see these people) and it was good to get a win there today.
I need to take a shower and get to bed to gear up for what's looking to be a busy week......snow is definitely upon us, we have November close on Friday, and I'm leaving early on Friday to head to Indy for a girls weekend with my mom, sister & Nana. We're staying at a hotel that's right next to Circle Center and have tickets to the Beef & Boards show on Saturday night. If I've been to downtown Indy for Christmas, its been a LONG time, and I'm looking forward to spending some time with my family just shopping and enjoying the season!
Here's to looking up -
I slept a LONG time Friday night, and I couldn't have needed it more. I'm still trying to stave off this cold or whatever is trying to take over, but lots of sleep in the last 2 nights, lots of water, and lots of day/nyquil have helped.
Yesterday, Chris didn't get off until 2....we went to a late lunch and we came back so he could take a nap. For the first time in....????? 2 years at least?, I went to Confession (Reconciliation) at St. Brendans. The Msgr. "running the show" was so nice and supportive and kind. I was a mess. A sniffling, somber, remorseful, MESS. I wasn't in there but maybe 5 minutes, but was able to come out to a darkened, candlelit church (Mass getting ready to start within the next hour) and kneel by myself, in silence, and just BE. I think when some people hear other people say "I felt God with me," it sounds cheesy........but there isn't a single other feeling I can even put into words. All at once, I just felt such peace. Lightened. What I've done in the past, the big things and little things.........it was just such an amazing experience for me and I'm glad I went. I also went to Mass last night for the first time in a long time for the 2nd Sunday of Advent, and I'm glad I did that, too.
Last night, Chris & I went out to dinner and came back home and watched Valentine's Day that he had DVR'd. I heard a lot of people that didn't like that movie, but I thought it was really cute! I still can't believe how many big names were in there.
Today, I slept late again, we went to grab lunch, went grocery shopping, and came back to watch my 3-8 Cowboys BEAT the 6-5 Colts!! Outside of Dallas' division rivals, I hate the Colts more than any other team in the league (95% of my Colts' fan acquaintances being why.....seriously, look up bandwagon and you'll see these people) and it was good to get a win there today.
I need to take a shower and get to bed to gear up for what's looking to be a busy week......snow is definitely upon us, we have November close on Friday, and I'm leaving early on Friday to head to Indy for a girls weekend with my mom, sister & Nana. We're staying at a hotel that's right next to Circle Center and have tickets to the Beef & Boards show on Saturday night. If I've been to downtown Indy for Christmas, its been a LONG time, and I'm looking forward to spending some time with my family just shopping and enjoying the season!
Here's to looking up -
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Happy Turkey Day!
It has been a whirlwind last couple of days. We left for TH on Wednesday night and just got back home a little while ago. Everyday has been action-packed, with not a lot of sleep for either of us (not used to a king-sized bed)......so in the interest of a semi-organized post, I'm stealing this idea from other blogs I've read......and "condensed" the weekend into T.U.R.K.E.Y (I started with T.H.A.N.K.S.G.I.V.I.N.G.....but my mind is having problems functioning, and I'm just not that creative).....
T - is for thankful. For my parents, for my brother & sister, for my faith, for my husband and the millions of 2nd chances hes given me, for the Cowboys no matter how much talent they have but still lose, for a good job that pays for a roof over our head and food on our table, for friends.
U - is for unreal. Unreal how the Cowboys continue to shoot themselves in the foot. A great Thanksgiving Day tradition continued when the Cowboys took on the reigning Super Bowl champs, the New Orleans Saints. They were down 17-0 after the 1st quarter and it looked like a blowout. They persevered and didn't quit and actually went up 27-23 with 5 minutes to go. After a big defensive stop, Dallas had a 3rd and 10.....bomb to Roy Williams.....runs up the field for 40+ yards......and the ball gets stripped with 3:30 to go. Wham bam thank you ma'am, 1:05 and 5 plays later, N.O. marched down the field to take the lead, 30-27. We got the ball back with 1:55 to go and got into a long FG range (59 yards), and Buehler just missed it. Oh well.
R - is for Relationship....with my mother in law. It was never bad, per se', just.....daughter-and-mother-in-law-like. Civil, nice, polite....but yesterday, I think we really had a great day together that really upped our relationship. Last year, Chris' sister, Jenn; his mom, Sharon; and I went shopping on Black Friday and had a LOT of fun. This year, Jenn was in Iowa with her fiance's family, so it was just her and me. I think both of us were a little nervous about how the day would go, and were a little ill at ease at first, but we got some Starbucks, hit Old Navy first, and we were on a roll from there. We shopped from 7am to 3pm straight. I hand picked all of her gifts (because she hates picking out things) and she paid for them - we had lunch - and then we came back to her house and I wrapped everything for her. It's funny knowing beforehand what Chris is getting :)
K - is for the Kids table. I'm not sitting at it next year. And neither is Chris. I'm calling seniority in 2011. End of story.
E - is for excitement...over new babies! My AOII pledge sister/ former roommate/ bridesmaid Jenn and her husband welcomed their first baby into the world Wednesday 11/24. They didn't know the sex beforehand so it was exciting to get the text saying it was a boy! Welcome Lawson Shane! Jenn - so excited for you....and can't wait to see you in a couple weeks when we come through for Christmas :) Then, Chris' Sigma Chi brother/ former roommate/ groomsman Cory and his wife Amber welcomed THEIR first baby into the world today! They did know the sex beforehand, but it was still exciting to know he was here. He wasn't supposed to be here until December 6, but for some reason she was induced last night and he arrived around 2:30 pm today. Just a little guy - 6 lbs, 12 oz and 20" long. We stopped by the hospital on our way home to give them a few little things and to see the proud parents. We didn't get to see him because he had low blood sugar and they had him on a warmer, but we'll see him in a few weeks, too :)
Y - is for not Yet (lame, but Y is hard). I said this a lot this weekend. So did Chris. "When are you guys going to have a baby?" "You guys pregnant yet?" "When are you guys due?" Some joking, some not, some trying to BE joking but weren't......it was like our first year everyone gave us a free pass. Our 2nd anniversary hit on August 30 and everyone kind of took that date as the date to start asking. It's HARD to say "not yet" when we're surrounded by babies, when my baby fever spikes just by walking through a baby section at Target, when people keep asking. I'm not annoyed by it and I don't think Chris is, really, either, but at the same time.....it's sometimes hard to just slap a smile on your face and give people an answer they don't want. I KNOW our family and friends want what's best for us, and so do we.....but man oh man is it hard to know when that time IS! Especially seeing little Colin tonight......and earlier today we went to my mom's little babysitting charges' house. At 2 1/2, Landon is practically part of the family since my mom has had him since he was 3 months old.....and he just got a baby sister, Emeline, this July. I walked her to sleep this afternoon before we left, and I just fell in LOVE. She has these big brown eyes that are so SERIOUS, and just look & look at you....but she fell asleep as I was bouncing her and walking with her, and I just melted. She's a beautiful little baby and there is just something so.....amazing - how they just trust you so much. Yup, baby fever is spiked.
No matter how worried or stressed or anxious or annoyed I may get day to day............at the end of everyday, I get to lay my head down in my warm bed, next to a man I love and loves me back, with the knowledge that I always have my family behind me, friends I can go to, food in my belly & a roof over my head, my health and a God that no matter how "bad" of a Catholic I am...........is always listening. I can't ask for much more than that.
T - is for thankful. For my parents, for my brother & sister, for my faith, for my husband and the millions of 2nd chances hes given me, for the Cowboys no matter how much talent they have but still lose, for a good job that pays for a roof over our head and food on our table, for friends.
U - is for unreal. Unreal how the Cowboys continue to shoot themselves in the foot. A great Thanksgiving Day tradition continued when the Cowboys took on the reigning Super Bowl champs, the New Orleans Saints. They were down 17-0 after the 1st quarter and it looked like a blowout. They persevered and didn't quit and actually went up 27-23 with 5 minutes to go. After a big defensive stop, Dallas had a 3rd and 10.....bomb to Roy Williams.....runs up the field for 40+ yards......and the ball gets stripped with 3:30 to go. Wham bam thank you ma'am, 1:05 and 5 plays later, N.O. marched down the field to take the lead, 30-27. We got the ball back with 1:55 to go and got into a long FG range (59 yards), and Buehler just missed it. Oh well.
R - is for Relationship....with my mother in law. It was never bad, per se', just.....daughter-and-mother-in-law-like. Civil, nice, polite....but yesterday, I think we really had a great day together that really upped our relationship. Last year, Chris' sister, Jenn; his mom, Sharon; and I went shopping on Black Friday and had a LOT of fun. This year, Jenn was in Iowa with her fiance's family, so it was just her and me. I think both of us were a little nervous about how the day would go, and were a little ill at ease at first, but we got some Starbucks, hit Old Navy first, and we were on a roll from there. We shopped from 7am to 3pm straight. I hand picked all of her gifts (because she hates picking out things) and she paid for them - we had lunch - and then we came back to her house and I wrapped everything for her. It's funny knowing beforehand what Chris is getting :)
K - is for the Kids table. I'm not sitting at it next year. And neither is Chris. I'm calling seniority in 2011. End of story.
E - is for excitement...over new babies! My AOII pledge sister/ former roommate/ bridesmaid Jenn and her husband welcomed their first baby into the world Wednesday 11/24. They didn't know the sex beforehand so it was exciting to get the text saying it was a boy! Welcome Lawson Shane! Jenn - so excited for you....and can't wait to see you in a couple weeks when we come through for Christmas :) Then, Chris' Sigma Chi brother/ former roommate/ groomsman Cory and his wife Amber welcomed THEIR first baby into the world today! They did know the sex beforehand, but it was still exciting to know he was here. He wasn't supposed to be here until December 6, but for some reason she was induced last night and he arrived around 2:30 pm today. Just a little guy - 6 lbs, 12 oz and 20" long. We stopped by the hospital on our way home to give them a few little things and to see the proud parents. We didn't get to see him because he had low blood sugar and they had him on a warmer, but we'll see him in a few weeks, too :)
Y - is for not Yet (lame, but Y is hard). I said this a lot this weekend. So did Chris. "When are you guys going to have a baby?" "You guys pregnant yet?" "When are you guys due?" Some joking, some not, some trying to BE joking but weren't......it was like our first year everyone gave us a free pass. Our 2nd anniversary hit on August 30 and everyone kind of took that date as the date to start asking. It's HARD to say "not yet" when we're surrounded by babies, when my baby fever spikes just by walking through a baby section at Target, when people keep asking. I'm not annoyed by it and I don't think Chris is, really, either, but at the same time.....it's sometimes hard to just slap a smile on your face and give people an answer they don't want. I KNOW our family and friends want what's best for us, and so do we.....but man oh man is it hard to know when that time IS! Especially seeing little Colin tonight......and earlier today we went to my mom's little babysitting charges' house. At 2 1/2, Landon is practically part of the family since my mom has had him since he was 3 months old.....and he just got a baby sister, Emeline, this July. I walked her to sleep this afternoon before we left, and I just fell in LOVE. She has these big brown eyes that are so SERIOUS, and just look & look at you....but she fell asleep as I was bouncing her and walking with her, and I just melted. She's a beautiful little baby and there is just something so.....amazing - how they just trust you so much. Yup, baby fever is spiked.
No matter how worried or stressed or anxious or annoyed I may get day to day............at the end of everyday, I get to lay my head down in my warm bed, next to a man I love and loves me back, with the knowledge that I always have my family behind me, friends I can go to, food in my belly & a roof over my head, my health and a God that no matter how "bad" of a Catholic I am...........is always listening. I can't ask for much more than that.
Monday, October 18, 2010
It's Fall Y'all
What a dumb title. I suck at coming up with creative titles to these things.
What a great weekend. I left work early on Friday to make it to Terre Haute by about 6:30. My mom, at my request, made homemade meatloaf, mashed potatoes and meatloaf gravy. SO good. Chris won't let me make him meatloaf, and even if he did, it wouldn't be as good as Mom's. After dinner, my dad & I went to The Terminal (a sports bar on ISU's campus) to drown our sorrows over the Cowboys. We ended up talking to the producers of the ESPN radio station in Terre Haute who recruited my dad to be a weekly local caller. It was really funny! He just knows so much about so many sports that he's fun to talk to (as long as you're a fan of his teams....the Cowboys ((duh)), St. Louis Cardinals, LA Lakers and #48 Jimmie Johnson ((he got started on that from Anthony))). We played a little pool and hung out, and it was cool. The guys he was talking to thought it was cool he was having a drink with his daughter, and I did too ;-)
Saturday morning, I woke up at an ungodly hour for me (8:45) to run a 5K with my mom (who walked it). It was my first one ever, and it was COLD, but I did pretty well for the couple of decent hills and the temperature. I finished in 31:38 and in 3rd place in my age division! Mom finished 4th (really 3rd....the 1st place walker a lot of people think cheated.....and she left before awards even started.....I'm sorry, if you know you won, wouldn't you stick around? But she's a good sport and was proud of her 41:40 finish).
We went right home and changed, picked up Megan & headed to Bridgeton's Covered Bridge Festival. It was such a great afternoon. We shopped just about every stand and shop and got some great deals. I got started with Christmas shopping with my dad's gift and my white elephant gift for Chris' family, plus a couple little things for the house & myself. We walked alot, laughed a lot, and just enjoyed each other's company. It was so fun. That night, the 3 of us went to dinner while Anthony went to a girl's Sweet 16 party (He's a heartbreaker. Those poor girls. He's tall, he's funny, he always wears cologne & smells good, he wears nice clothes and is cute. All added up, girls just fall all over him) and Dad stayed at home to watch the race. Again....lots of laughs. I absolutely love my mom & sister. They are truly my best friends in this world, besides Chris. They know me better than almost anyone, they know how to make me laugh, they let me cry on their shoulders, and even after my worst mistakes, I know they're there.
Anyway. Yesterday wasn't as great as a day. I wanted to stay home an extra day but....couldn't. Had to come back. Ended up having to listen to the Cowboys game on AM radio which was just as well. They suck. Mike & Mike did a game this morning, "5 Words That Describe Your Team"....I came up with plenty (When is Jimmy coming back? Too many stupid unnecessary penalties. No reason to start celebrating. When will Wade be fired? Players not being held accountable). But somehow, people aren't writing them off yet. I wish I could just say to hell with it and not get worked up for next Monday night's game....but we all know that's impossible. Got to bed too late last night (damn my need to talk things out instead of just letting them rest with Chris) and went to work in a foul mood this morning.
But, as they say -
Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.
What a great weekend. I left work early on Friday to make it to Terre Haute by about 6:30. My mom, at my request, made homemade meatloaf, mashed potatoes and meatloaf gravy. SO good. Chris won't let me make him meatloaf, and even if he did, it wouldn't be as good as Mom's. After dinner, my dad & I went to The Terminal (a sports bar on ISU's campus) to drown our sorrows over the Cowboys. We ended up talking to the producers of the ESPN radio station in Terre Haute who recruited my dad to be a weekly local caller. It was really funny! He just knows so much about so many sports that he's fun to talk to (as long as you're a fan of his teams....the Cowboys ((duh)), St. Louis Cardinals, LA Lakers and #48 Jimmie Johnson ((he got started on that from Anthony))). We played a little pool and hung out, and it was cool. The guys he was talking to thought it was cool he was having a drink with his daughter, and I did too ;-)
Saturday morning, I woke up at an ungodly hour for me (8:45) to run a 5K with my mom (who walked it). It was my first one ever, and it was COLD, but I did pretty well for the couple of decent hills and the temperature. I finished in 31:38 and in 3rd place in my age division! Mom finished 4th (really 3rd....the 1st place walker a lot of people think cheated.....and she left before awards even started.....I'm sorry, if you know you won, wouldn't you stick around? But she's a good sport and was proud of her 41:40 finish).
We went right home and changed, picked up Megan & headed to Bridgeton's Covered Bridge Festival. It was such a great afternoon. We shopped just about every stand and shop and got some great deals. I got started with Christmas shopping with my dad's gift and my white elephant gift for Chris' family, plus a couple little things for the house & myself. We walked alot, laughed a lot, and just enjoyed each other's company. It was so fun. That night, the 3 of us went to dinner while Anthony went to a girl's Sweet 16 party (He's a heartbreaker. Those poor girls. He's tall, he's funny, he always wears cologne & smells good, he wears nice clothes and is cute. All added up, girls just fall all over him) and Dad stayed at home to watch the race. Again....lots of laughs. I absolutely love my mom & sister. They are truly my best friends in this world, besides Chris. They know me better than almost anyone, they know how to make me laugh, they let me cry on their shoulders, and even after my worst mistakes, I know they're there.
Anyway. Yesterday wasn't as great as a day. I wanted to stay home an extra day but....couldn't. Had to come back. Ended up having to listen to the Cowboys game on AM radio which was just as well. They suck. Mike & Mike did a game this morning, "5 Words That Describe Your Team"....I came up with plenty (When is Jimmy coming back? Too many stupid unnecessary penalties. No reason to start celebrating. When will Wade be fired? Players not being held accountable). But somehow, people aren't writing them off yet. I wish I could just say to hell with it and not get worked up for next Monday night's game....but we all know that's impossible. Got to bed too late last night (damn my need to talk things out instead of just letting them rest with Chris) and went to work in a foul mood this morning.
But, as they say -
Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Happy November!
Well friends, it has been almost a month since I wrote last....it seems to sound like a broken record, but SERIOUSLY....where is time going??!?
It has definitely been a fun, busy month since I wrote last.
The weekend of Halloween, Chris' parents came over to Columbus, which was fun. We just had a relaxing, fun weekend visiting. Saturday, we explored the market downtown and went to Target, and that night, we went to the Movie Tavern, where we saw "Couples Retreat" (which was really funny!). That night, we played euchre, drank, and then played Clue (fun!). They also got me a $25 gift card to Starbucks and a $25 gift card to Victoria's Secret, which was really nice!
Then, last weekend, Chris and I went to TH on Friday night so that we could see his grandpa Saturday. Fortunately, he was having a good day and seemed to be fairly aware of what was going on. He's at home, but is in constant pain and Chris' grandma has to be there every second. It really bothers Chris that we don't live closer, so he could help out, but hopefully he will be okay for awhile.
Saturday night, we went to Indy to watch my cousin Christopher get married. It was a really fun night with my family, and we all danced the night away. Sunday, we got up and went to Johnny Carino's for lunch (just Chris & I with my family) before heading back to Columbus to watch the Cowboys get a big win at Philadelphia!
Wednesday was the big 2-6, and even though I had to work (landscapers don't get bank holidays :)), my work "made" me a card and took me out to lunch, so it was fun. Chris surprised me that morning with a bouquet of flowers, 2 cards and a "scavenger hunt" around the apartment that led me to my sleeping husband, who was holding my brand new pink iPod, which I have been wanting ever since I washed my old one. Thanks, hubby!
Friday, we both took the day off, and we both slept in (much needed after a crazy week last week!). We then drove down to IKEA in Cincinnati and stopped at the outlets on the way back to Columbus. I found some great deals at Old Navy, and got a $120 pair of running shoes for $55. Yay for birthday money!
Yesterday was a lazy day besides getting errands done around town, which led to today's sorry loss at Green Bay. Whatever. Dallas has the most talent on paper, but if they have no heart, they'll never go anywhere. I'm anxious to see if Wade Phillips lasts through next season.
Well, tomorrow starts my last fiscal week of November, which means a short end of month week next week (2 days off for Turkey Day). I'm ready for Thanksgiving for sure....I've been good so far, not a single Christmas song played at work yet!!
It has definitely been a fun, busy month since I wrote last.
The weekend of Halloween, Chris' parents came over to Columbus, which was fun. We just had a relaxing, fun weekend visiting. Saturday, we explored the market downtown and went to Target, and that night, we went to the Movie Tavern, where we saw "Couples Retreat" (which was really funny!). That night, we played euchre, drank, and then played Clue (fun!). They also got me a $25 gift card to Starbucks and a $25 gift card to Victoria's Secret, which was really nice!
Then, last weekend, Chris and I went to TH on Friday night so that we could see his grandpa Saturday. Fortunately, he was having a good day and seemed to be fairly aware of what was going on. He's at home, but is in constant pain and Chris' grandma has to be there every second. It really bothers Chris that we don't live closer, so he could help out, but hopefully he will be okay for awhile.
Saturday night, we went to Indy to watch my cousin Christopher get married. It was a really fun night with my family, and we all danced the night away. Sunday, we got up and went to Johnny Carino's for lunch (just Chris & I with my family) before heading back to Columbus to watch the Cowboys get a big win at Philadelphia!
Wednesday was the big 2-6, and even though I had to work (landscapers don't get bank holidays :)), my work "made" me a card and took me out to lunch, so it was fun. Chris surprised me that morning with a bouquet of flowers, 2 cards and a "scavenger hunt" around the apartment that led me to my sleeping husband, who was holding my brand new pink iPod, which I have been wanting ever since I washed my old one. Thanks, hubby!
Friday, we both took the day off, and we both slept in (much needed after a crazy week last week!). We then drove down to IKEA in Cincinnati and stopped at the outlets on the way back to Columbus. I found some great deals at Old Navy, and got a $120 pair of running shoes for $55. Yay for birthday money!
Yesterday was a lazy day besides getting errands done around town, which led to today's sorry loss at Green Bay. Whatever. Dallas has the most talent on paper, but if they have no heart, they'll never go anywhere. I'm anxious to see if Wade Phillips lasts through next season.
Well, tomorrow starts my last fiscal week of November, which means a short end of month week next week (2 days off for Turkey Day). I'm ready for Thanksgiving for sure....I've been good so far, not a single Christmas song played at work yet!!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Longest Week
Well, friends...Friday. Finally. I feel like I am always counting down to the weekends, and time is just going too fast....but this week it felt like Friday couldn't get her fast enough. It wasn't a bad week, it wasn't a great week, it was just a....blah...week.
10 weeks from today is Christmas. Wow. Crazy.
I am exhausted. The sickness that has been floating around Columbus and around my work, and I feel like I am losing the battle against my immune system. Dangit.
Bye week for the Cowboys. One less heart attack for the weekend.
Chris' grandpa is doing so-so. He's back home, but they found a mass on his liver during some tests this past week, and they're doing a biopsy on Tuesday. Pray for good things.
Nothing else to report. I'm watching "Say Yes to the Dress" and am having fond memories of looking for my own dress.
Good night!
10 weeks from today is Christmas. Wow. Crazy.
I am exhausted. The sickness that has been floating around Columbus and around my work, and I feel like I am losing the battle against my immune system. Dangit.
Bye week for the Cowboys. One less heart attack for the weekend.
Chris' grandpa is doing so-so. He's back home, but they found a mass on his liver during some tests this past week, and they're doing a biopsy on Tuesday. Pray for good things.
Nothing else to report. I'm watching "Say Yes to the Dress" and am having fond memories of looking for my own dress.
Good night!
Monday, September 14, 2009
The King's Weekend: By The Numbers
28: number of hours it took for my cousin, Kristi, to deliver her & her husband (Wes)'s first child, Ava Grace Reed. They started the inducing at 5:30 on Friday night and Ava made her arrival at 9.12 pm on 9/12/09. Welcome, Ava!
3: number of great hours I spent in the mid-September sunshine on Saturday afternoon.
60(ish): pool temperature (it felt like)....had to jump in after getting too hot, and promptly got out....COLD!
18: points USC scored against hometown favorite (duh) Ohio State on Saturday night. OSU only scored 15. It got worse...
4: the number of points OSU's UNRANKED archrival Michigan beat #16 ranked Notre Dame by on Saturday afternoon. Ouch.
11: OSU's new ranking, falling 3 from #8
353: Tony Romo's new career high passing yards in a game, Sunday vs. Tampa Bay
1965: before yesterday, the last time a Cowboys team had 2 or more plays of 60 yards or more
13: number of points the Cowboys beat Tampa Bay by...in hot, humid Florida
2: number of hours Chris & I spent going through old documents, bills, statements, and general junk paperwork in our apartment. Two bags full of trash and one full of shredded paper later, we now have no more bills hanging around from 2006 (they were somewhat organized, but who knows when I might have had to prove that I DID pay a Vectren bill back on Bethel?)
0: the times Chris & I ate out this weekend. Boo.
102: days until Christmas!
1: box so far earmarked for Goodwill. Many more coming I'm sure!
That pretty much marks our weekend. A great weekend of football, sunshine, and being together. And - praising God for Ava's safe arrival. Congrats Kristi & Wes!
3: number of great hours I spent in the mid-September sunshine on Saturday afternoon.
60(ish): pool temperature (it felt like)....had to jump in after getting too hot, and promptly got out....COLD!
18: points USC scored against hometown favorite (duh) Ohio State on Saturday night. OSU only scored 15. It got worse...
4: the number of points OSU's UNRANKED archrival Michigan beat #16 ranked Notre Dame by on Saturday afternoon. Ouch.
11: OSU's new ranking, falling 3 from #8
353: Tony Romo's new career high passing yards in a game, Sunday vs. Tampa Bay
1965: before yesterday, the last time a Cowboys team had 2 or more plays of 60 yards or more
13: number of points the Cowboys beat Tampa Bay by...in hot, humid Florida
2: number of hours Chris & I spent going through old documents, bills, statements, and general junk paperwork in our apartment. Two bags full of trash and one full of shredded paper later, we now have no more bills hanging around from 2006 (they were somewhat organized, but who knows when I might have had to prove that I DID pay a Vectren bill back on Bethel?)
0: the times Chris & I ate out this weekend. Boo.
102: days until Christmas!
1: box so far earmarked for Goodwill. Many more coming I'm sure!
That pretty much marks our weekend. A great weekend of football, sunshine, and being together. And - praising God for Ava's safe arrival. Congrats Kristi & Wes!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Bad Attitude
I have a very bad attitude today. I don't know why. Nothing in particular has happened today, well, besides the fact that my car's alternator seems to be going out, but besides that....I'm just in a BAD mood. The day started off great....talked to my Dad for a few minutes (I had to quiz him on a Cowboys trivia question), which always cheers me up. He is always able to keep me from spinning out of control and putting things in perspective - he just tells it like it is. Black, and white. That's it. Of course, Mom is good at putting things in perspective, too - she and I just like to put a little more...."emotion" in things though, sometimes!
My problem is, I think, that I let the people around me affect how my day is going to go. If people around me are stressed, I get stressed (well, that kind of goes with my job. If people around me are going crazy with work, I'm their support system). If people around me are sad and down, I feel myself coming down. If people around me are happy and "up," so am I. Is that normal? Maybe it is, coming from a female perspective. We tend to want to help people...and no one wants to be THAT person...the downer when everyone is happy, the super-hyper-happy person when people are down.
I'm an adult. I should be able to completely think for myself, and do my thing, and not really care what people think. But that's not the case. I let people get to me. I let things that don't even INVOLVE me or my family or loved ones get to me. Why can't I just block out that "bad" stuff? Go about my day, go about my life, live my life, do my thing...without worrying what other people are going to think?
PSHT. I need to get out of my own head right now and count my blessings. Focus on the good, the potential, the promises. I have so many wonderful things to be thankful for that I just can't let people get to me as easily as I do.
Easier said than done.
Time for some deflation. Tomorrow is a morning full of meetings and an afternoon of preparing for having Monday off. Is it 5:00 on Friday yet?
My problem is, I think, that I let the people around me affect how my day is going to go. If people around me are stressed, I get stressed (well, that kind of goes with my job. If people around me are going crazy with work, I'm their support system). If people around me are sad and down, I feel myself coming down. If people around me are happy and "up," so am I. Is that normal? Maybe it is, coming from a female perspective. We tend to want to help people...and no one wants to be THAT person...the downer when everyone is happy, the super-hyper-happy person when people are down.
I'm an adult. I should be able to completely think for myself, and do my thing, and not really care what people think. But that's not the case. I let people get to me. I let things that don't even INVOLVE me or my family or loved ones get to me. Why can't I just block out that "bad" stuff? Go about my day, go about my life, live my life, do my thing...without worrying what other people are going to think?
PSHT. I need to get out of my own head right now and count my blessings. Focus on the good, the potential, the promises. I have so many wonderful things to be thankful for that I just can't let people get to me as easily as I do.
Easier said than done.
Time for some deflation. Tomorrow is a morning full of meetings and an afternoon of preparing for having Monday off. Is it 5:00 on Friday yet?
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