So much for my weekly updates. I suck.
Work has been SO. INSANELY. BUSY. lately. They never have replaced my "co" BA, which is fine by me b/c I'm not good at delegating work anyway (not to mention my tasks are kind of hard to split up since they all kind of connect to each other), but that leaves most the admin work for my branch to.....me. My branch manager, while super nice, cool and we get along GREAT, not to mention we work really well together, is still fairly new to the company (will be 2 years for him in August) and hadn't even gotten his arms around our not-so-small maintenance branch before they threw in the construction/ residential piece in on top of us back in January. So - it's spring. Things are nuts. Stuff is growing, fast. I had almost 90 guys on my payroll this week, did almost $100K in billing and my payables stack today just made me want to run away. But - I'll make it. It's nice to know, in a way, that so many people can count on me..........even if it makes me want to hide under my desk.
In other news, to acknowledge the big ugly elephant in the room, there is no baby yet. Still. Without getting into a big emotional fit over (b/c God knows there have been a few since this process began), or getting overly detailed about it (anyone care to know that out of my last 12 cycles, not one was the same length as any other in the 12-month span? Didn't think so), we are hopefully soon going to start getting some answers and what our next steps are. Til now, all I had was a GP here in Columbus, and so with some input from lady friends here, and a referral from my doc, I have an appointment at an OBGYN Monday - which is great, because I thought they would make me wait forever and ever, or at least another 3 months, when our "year of trying with no birth control" is up. I finally waved the white flag after this past go-around, when I calculated myself to start on day 37 (semi-normal length for me, if a little long).....and still no start by day 42, but 3 negative tests in a row............yeah, a minor (my Mom may say otherwise) meltdown ensued. I'm just so, so tired of it all.
If one more person tells me to "Just relax, it'll happen," or "trust in God's plan" one more time, they're getting it. I KNOW THESE THINGS. In my head, I am positive that as soon as I can quit thinking about the baby that should've been here anytime now (since we started in August), it will happen. But how? How do you stop thinking about it? Work keeps me busy enough, I'm getting to the gym and outside to run and work in my yard more, but everytime I turn around, someone else is pregnant. Facebook is the death trap of babies (seriously.....a dozen friends in the last month, at least), and so is my own family. (Yup - Chris & I are going to be an aunt and uncle again in November....my sister in law Jenn & her husband Kevin are due right after Thanksgiving - they ltierally told everyone the day they found out. Couldn't wait a single second!) So - while I'm excited for friends (hi, Ashley :)) and family who are expecting little ones, I am just trying to keep my head above water and out of that scary place that says, "You'll never get to be a mom."
In happier news...............it's spring, it's gorgeous out, and tomorrow is Friday. Finally. I promise to be back sooner than 4 weeks from now!
