....a prayer that, since I was just a little girl, I still say before drifting to sleep at night. It's usually quick and is usually a last thought before I truly fall asleep, but I say it - every night.
I subscribe to a wonderful devotion that sends daily emails.....Proverbs 31. It's phenomenal. It's not one of those long and drawn out emails you get with other sites - just short, simple, thought-provoking little tidbits that more often than not make me sit back and think....."huh."
Today's was no exception. It talked about how modern day people think of our days at rise, work then rest.....when in the Bible it says: “God called the light ‘day,’ and the darkness he called ‘night.’ And there was evening, and there was morning— the first day.” Genesis 1:5 (NIV)
Interesting. Rest, rise, work. So often during the day (weekdays especially), I so look forward to going to sleep. I adore sleep. I love naps. I love sleeping in. I love getting to rest and shut my brain down from a long day (easier said than done, sometimes!). How different would it be though, if when I laid down at night, I thought of the upcoming rest as another way for God to work through me? The lady who wrote this devotional said, "As I lie down, close my eyes, pray, and slip from consciousness, I do so with the understanding that it is God who holds everything together during my temporary absence from the world. And it’s Him who will continue to hold everything together when I rise and work in the coming daylight. At no point — day or night — am I independent of Him. He even has the power to direct my dreams should He desire."
Isn't that neat? I never really thought of sleep this way. I of all people know how much in control we like to be, to be in control of every thought, action, emotion. I think it's a very comforting thought that even in my most vulnerable state of being, God is there.......working through me, working in me. I am never alone, even in sleep. Even in rest.
This is an idea that has started kind of rolling around in my brain........kind of like a marble in a big box.....I'm not sure where these thoughts are going and I know I want to think about this some more....but for now, I just wanted to get some initial thoughts on paper (or keyboard).
God is so much bigger than I am. He's bigger than my marriage, He's bigger than my work life, He's bigger than all of our struggles & worries about money and babies and houses. He's bigger than those moments of my (too-often) doubting myself and my purpose in this life. He's bigger than my personal insecurities, He's bigger than all the mistakes I've made (even the really big big BIG mistake that almost cost me my marriage)......no matter how alone or how lonely or how sad or happy or glad or upset or ANYTHING I am or feel - He is there.
Why do I fight Him?
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